Adventure Travel Abroad

Zelda’s Adventure: This Can’t Be Real – PART 1 – Game Grumps

Zelda’s Adventure: This Can’t Be Real – PART 1 – Game Grumps


Arin: Hey, I’m grump! Danny: I’m not so grump! Both: And we’re the Game Grumps! Arin: Hey, welcome to the black screen. Danny: Well, this is fucking- ohhh (Arin: oh nonono) Danny: Oh god, is that what it looks like? (Arin: Spoilers!) Danny: oh no! (Arin: Spoilers!) Danny: That was horrible looking! (Arin: Spoilers.) Oh my God. Arin: I gotta go back to the- Hold on, I gotta get to the intro. Here we- oh god. (Danny: Oh, no) Wait, is this what’s happening right now? (Danny: Yeah) Danny: I think you’re need to- (Arin: Is this the credits?) You need to hit reset ( Arin: oh Anna) Anna Roth. (Arin: Oh Anna) Danny: Okay, so for anyone who doesn’t know this is the this is the third and final Danny: Zelda CdI game yet. Don’t worry. We won’t be making copies of it. (Arin: Yeah who would want to?) Arin: Well I guess this came cost like $400 now Danny: Yeah, thanks to someone- (Arin: God damn it, fucking, I know somebody sent it and I know who sent it.) Arin: I just got to look it up. We’ll put it in. Thank you *gurgled mumbling*. Danny: *laughing* (Arin: So thanks.) Danny: Thank you so much. (Arin: Thank you) um (Arin: We’ll put it in. Did it just go to-what the fuck?) Arin: Did it just reset the CDI because, like, didn’t understand what was happening? (Danny: Did the CDI just reject the game?) (Arin: Oh my fucking god.) Danny: This is the zelda game that the guy who made the other two zelda games for CDI Danny: Said was so shitty he couldn’t get through it. (Arin: Okay. So here we go.) Arin: This is what I want. This is the intro. (Danny: This looks good.) Oh, it’s good. It’s good alright. Danny: I mean, I feel like I’m really on a-*can opening sound* Danny: What am I? What is this, a pile of shit? A pile of- (Arin: Like the mountain is a rocket ship…) Yes. Arin: Flying through the space.) Danny: Welcome to Zelda’s R adventure (Arin: This is great) Both: *woah-ing in unison* Danny: Boy, this is uh, one rough zoom in Arin: Yeah, it’s kind of like *weird noises from pits of hell* Danny: Yeah, okay. We’re right there now. Danny: Oh shit, is it live action? (Arin: Yes, it is.) YES. (Arin: Oh yeah) Arin:Who is this? This is like… Zelda’s Uncle? (Danny: *old man voice* I am princess Zelda!) Arin: *old man voice* Link, save me. (Danny: *laughing*) Arin: *old man voice* I can’t read Arin: Gan-non Arin: Oh god, it’s clearly like a young dude doing an old man’s voice. (Danny: totally) *somewhat awful voice over of note on screen* Danny: Pause for laugh. *shitty voice over*: A brave warrior must be found to face this evil monster! (Arin: That’s not what it says) Danny: Yeah, could they not program that in? (Arin: yeah) All right fine. (Arin: They’ve captured link!) Stop! Ohh Danny: God Arin: Dude, it’s nice. It’s good. (Danny: he doesn’t even-) Arin: Ohhh no. (Danny: what’s happening?) They couldn’t afford Arin: *hiccup(?)* They couldn’t afford to film the whole thing so… (Arin: Mmm.) Danny: It barely fit over his or her wig (Danny: What am I looking at right?) Arin: It’s the guide crowning Zelda or so- I don’t know Arin: Give her the Magic- She’s like it’s heavy. It’s choking me. (Danny: Every snowflake in hyrule is heavy as shit.) Arin: When it snows it’s like war was cast on us from the gods. (Danny: Oh God trust me. We’ve got nothing else to do. ) Danny: Make us wait as long as you need to. (Arin: All right all right here we go.) Arin: Oh I got to create a- (Danny: Ah man. We missed the whole plot.) There’s no fucking plot! (Danny:Okay just enter thy name) Link was captured by G-g-gan- Arin: Gannon and then the old guy was like “oh Zelda take this pendant of power or some shit” Arin: And that was it. (Danny: that’s a hell of a ‘Q’.) That is a ‘Q’. Let’s use it. Arin: Uhh…qo Arin: Qox…Qoxon… Arin: Mafas Danny: Well done Arin. (Arin: Qoxonmafase) *wholesome laughter* Danny: You should be-BLARGH (Both: *laughing*) Danny: You stabbed the name generator! (Arin: You’ve been murdered for horrible names!) Oh my God Danny: What a absolutely-oh yeah. (Arin: I got to play as Qoxonmafase.) I’d rather- rather be one of the empties. Arin: Hey, they had a lot of letters. I had to use-utilize the power that they bestow-ohhhhh Danny: oh no! Danny: It’s so bad Danny: It’s so bad Danny: Oh, I don’t know if I could look at this for a whole series. (Arin: That that was the menu it took like an hour to…) Arin: Load (Danny: Are you serious?) Arin: Here we go-uh oh Arin: Ohhh (Danny: *laughing*) Arin: No Arin: No (Danny: oh my God) Oh have mercy. (Danny: This is just brutal…can you interact with anything?) You mean like behind it? Arin: It’s just kind of like… Arin: When am I going to come out? (Danny: Doo-d-d-doo-d-doo!) Arin: There I am (Danny: *doo-dooing continues*) (Danny: I guess I’ll just add it in) Arin: If this was for the NES. If this is the first Zelta game that came out-AAA Arin: Something or other. (Danny: Oh my God) Larries! (Danny: are you entering into battle mode? No, you’re just… Danny: ah fuck, I can’t believe you’ve done this (Arin: wow I died) (Arin: Holy shit, dude) Danny: back to ten minutes of the old man being like “oh my God” Arin: *old man voice* Put this necklace on it’ll protect you from nothing, literally nothing Danny: Arin, I do not think what this can be anything more than a one-off. (Arin: What are you talking about?) Arin: we have to finish this. (Danny: oh yeah, I’ll-) *eery voice* I have known you since you were a child (Danny: Oh my god) a difficult challenge You will have to go far and overcome- (Arin: to carry that fucking necklace) use your knowledge and strength to defeat your enemy (Arin: uh-huh, what about a sword?) (Danny: this is halfway between..) Danny: Zelda and the teletubbies game Danny: duck goes quack Arin: Uh-Huh? (Arin: Thank you) Danny: quack quack quack *raspberry noise* Arin: *teletubbies voice(?)* I made him drink gasoline Danny: *teletubies voice gone wrong GONESEXUAL* I made him drink gasoline. I thought it would make him go faster. Arin: There’s no enemies. (Danny: Oh God.) Oh what am I supposed to do? I don’t have anything. (Danny: Do you have any weapons?) Arin: I don’t have a single thing. I have the necklace. Arin: What is with these giant fucking stone-ass stone rocks? (Danny: she said use your, uh…) My wits? (Danny: yeah) Arin: What am I gonna? Do fucking- do math problems? (Danny: I don’t know.) I mean- (Danny: what is that? What are THOSE?) Arin: I don’t know man. I’m trying to find a place where I can get a fucking sword Arin: There’s an old man in a cave going “oh it’s dangerous” Danny: Jesus. I can’t believe- (Arin: because it is fucking dangerous. Got to load every screen for an hour) I can’t believe that this is so much worse (Arin: ah god) then the other Danny: Zeldas which were already two of the worst games we’ve ever played. (Arin: Is this it? Did I do it?) Arin: Oh my God it- (Danny: cutscene.) No. I hit the inventory button. (Danny: oh shit) But I don’t have any weapons! Danny: No Arin: So what am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to get a weapon at? Danny: I don’t know Qoxonfase, figure it out. (Arin: Return to game) Arin: I can do this, no, I can figure this out. Wait, oh, so exit is actually exit. It’s not exit Arin: the menu it’s like exit the (Danny: game) whole experience. (Danny: Oh, well. If only it were that easy.) Oh boy. It’s like hieroglyphics? (Danny: Yeah)Arin: oh, cool-*both* OHHHHHHHHH (Arin: Jesus) Danny: God this game could really use some music. (Arin: oh hey, mob went in) Oh good Arin: Let’s get that creepy eerie wind noise. (Danny: Yeah, it’s very ambient.) We’re covered in them Danny: It’s like the shit that like you go to sleep to, like white noise like oh, I’ll choose- tonight I’ll choose Danny: oscillating fan *disturbing voice* Zeldaaa (Danny: What?) it’s wrong to roam Hyrule unprotected. Look nearby for something to aid you. Danny: Honey bear, what do you think we’re doing? (Arin: *laughing* honey bear?) I mean my God Arin: Did I find it? No? I just found more heads. (Danny: Yeah, no, she doesn’t want you going up any further) Arin: Well where the fu- I feel like I’ve been everywhere! (Danny: you gotta-) AH! (Danny: oh my god) Arin: Jesus Christ dude (Danny: Zeldaaa, Zeldaaa) I feel like there’s… Arin: No, I won’t say it. (Danny: Go ahead.) No. I won’t say it (Danny: Say it) Arin: I’ll say it later (Danny: really?) after- (Danny: You won’t remember after- you’re gonna leave the sacred pizza pie?!) Arin: It’s a trivial pursuit these days. Arin: Well, I went all the directions though! (Danny: I’ll choose movies and entertainment) Arin: What game is the worst in the world? Arin: I don’t know. (Danny: you’re living it) Is this it? That looks like a sword in the stone. (Danny: Yes, it does) (Arin: Okay) Danny: Oh my goodness gracious. What year was this? Arin: Uh…Nineteen twixt. (Danny: yeah) This game does not -I guess I’m stuck (Danny: this game exists outside of time.) Exactly! (Danny: Yeah, I agree) Danny: There’s no year in which this is acceptable. (Arin: Ohhhh) Arin: God Arin: What are those? (Danny: This is just like how games were in like the 70s) Arin: This is how like people’s visions of how games were in the 70s. Oh, the forest of de bam Arin: Damn, de bam (Danny: that could say ogbam actually) da-ham? (Danny: that could say anything) Arin: Da-ham (Danny: oh God you can’t fight those things) Yeah, well, it’d be lovely if they game gave me a fucking sword. (Danny: You can barely fight the trees) Danny: Right now. Ohhh. (Arin: What- what even are they? Visually? What the fuck is going on there?) (Danny: How do they roar? they can’t have any lungs) Arin: They look like something that you find in a weird Artisanal Bakery. (Danny: *laughing*) Arin: And you’re just like what is that? And they’re like “Oh, it’s passionfruit Dabam”. (Danny: Yeah, we used all locally sourced salt.) Arin: The salt that was grown in our trees. (Danny: Oh, oh) Oh. *witch voice(?)* Tell you a great secret. (Arin: You got it) (Danny: Yeah, what could go wrong) (Arin: Let’s hear your secret) *that voice again* Hear me whisper? Trust no one with hair. Arin: with… Hair???? *Voice* Don’t even trust me! Haha! (Arin: I don’t…) I’ve stolen one of your lives! Ha! Arin: I don- what? (Danny: yeah, wow) I don’t even know what you are! (Danny: cool) Arin: What even are you I can’t even visually make you out? (Danny: Are you wearing a bandana?) (Danny: Is that a Bandana?) Arin: Is she like crouching over is she like- (Danny: is it a she? It sounded like a she but…) Danny: But that could be truly anything (Arin: They like-they actually) Arin: Rigged up-well alright (Danny: Okay) Arin: Well, they actually rigged up a bird’s-eye camera, and then like took pictures of actors. Little do they know Arin: Actual top-down view of people does not really read very well. (Danny: yeah, especially when they’re digitized to shit.) Arin: Oh my God, alright. Well I gotta figure out where the fuckin-where the fuck this sword is. Danny: Zelda Danny: Zelda, you’re stuck in a crappy game Zelda Danny: What are you gonna do to get out? (Arin: Is this it? Did it find it?) Arin: Is this the sword? Arin: Nope (Danny: Wow) Arin: I don’t fucking know, I don’t know where to fucking go. Okay, so the thing Arin: I was going to say is we should probably, from the goddamn get go, get a fucking walkthrough Danny: Yeah, what- why- why would you wait to say that that like I’m reaching for my phone as we speak- (Arin: I thought it- it would be funny for-ohhh) Arin: Here we go! (Danny: Ohhh shit) Danny: Five-hundred?! (Arin: I don’t have any money!) (Arin: Shut the fuck up) Danny: Just look around I’m sure you’ll find a hundred dollars lying on the forest floor Arin: Maybe you could kill some moblins with a sword. (Danny: With your silly little…) (Danny: Zelda Hands) Arin: alright. Give me give me a walkthrough. (Danny: What the hell is this game called?) It’s called Zelda’s adventure (Danny: Zelda’s Adventure Walkthrough) Arin: not to be confused with the adventures of Link. Oh Arin: Yeah, which is an actual Zelda game that a lot of people don’t like but you love (Danny: oh, Zelda 2?) Danny: Yeah, it’s terrific. I had a lot of fun with that (Danny: Well) Arin: That was before-man, when Zelda 2 came out that was before like Arin: Sequels in video games existed (Danny: yeah) so that was just kind of like well Arin: What do we do? We already made that game. We got to make a different game now. (Danny: Yeah, it was really a departure) Danny: Which was why people like weren’t super into it. (Arin: Yeah) Arin: Well I mean that’s such a no-brainer though Arin: It’s like we’ll just make the same game, but like with some extra shit in it, and then that’s the sequel Danny: Oh my God Arin: And that’s an update, that what people would say. That’s an update that’s on the- fuckin that’s zelda 1.5. As will. They say Arin: Fucking complainers th-the sally complainers out there. Oh, God Arin: Not that I’m one of them. I never complain (Danny: Absolutely not) Arin: Especially not on publicly viewed shows. (Danny: oh my God this-) Danny: Faq is so long-winded (Arin: yeah, well) Danny: it’s like taking me through the entire introductory scene. Like all their dialogue, like I heard that, that’s the one thing I understood Arin: Barely (Danny: yeah, oh my God) Was it like “if you name yourself Qoxonmafase Arin: You actually won’t be able to get the sword.” It’s impossible Arin: What the hell is happening here? Is the game glitching or is this their idea of graphics? Arin: I Can’t I can’t I (Danny: I can’t) can’t I can’t, I can’t even I can’t even understand how people would be like “this is okay” Danny: It’s not-who said this is okay? (Arin: Well, whoever shipped it!) Ohh Arin: Wouldn’t you think- I mean I guess they if they sunk like… Arin: Hundreds of thousands of dollars into it then they’re like well, we got to ship something (Danny: someone paid…) Danny: $400 for this (Arin: yeah) like no. Arin: And I’m glad it wasn’t me. (Danny: wow) The price tag on this game was actually like three hundred and forty six dollars (Danny: Yeesh) Arin: That’s how much this game is worth because it’s so rare Arin: But who would want to play it? Zero people-I fucking hit the inventory button on accident. Where do I go, Dan? (Danny: I dude-) Arin: You’ve been sucking down a walkthrough for like three hours over there! (Arin: It feels like.) Danny: You want to hear what I’m looking at? (Arin: JESUS) I mean, this is a kind of thing that’s in this walkthrough Danny: The design of my CDI controller is very similar-(Arin: Oh here it is, to the right) Oh my *laughing* Arin: How did I not go to the right? Arin: How is that not the one direction I went? (Danny: *choking in the background* Arin: I’m fuckin-come on man! Like seriously? Danny: There you go (Arin: I’m getting’em!) This is terrible. (Arin: Look at these vertical scanlines. The hell is going on man?) Danny: Is that a rupee? Is that what rupees look like? (Arin: I guess so) (Danny: Yeesh) Arin: And it makes the sound of mancala beads dropping into a bowl Danny: Oh, god (Danny: Oh dear.) Arin: Just no, there’s just no-no (Danny: No sound) No excitement. There’s no *laughing* Danny: there’s no anything! (Arin: This is just the…) Arin: What it is Arin: Alright, so where do I go now Dan? (Danny: I don’t know dude -I don’t know all of these walk throughs oh) (Danny: What?) *voice* a traveler of kind intentions has found me at last. Danny: Did they… Danny: Did they just find people in the office, like around the studio to do the voices for this? (Arin: Yeah) Danny: Like Sherry the secretary would you please come in voice this woman? “I’m starving and I’m thirsty” Danny: Thank you, Sherry. That’s good enough (Arin: *laughs* Arin: Thank you, Sherry. That was horrible, but we got it so (Danny: Yeah. Yeah) we’re gonna ship. Oh God what? Person in game: Oh fair princess pity a suffering creature exiled from great *garbled town name* in the north *voice* I ask only enough for a single meal for my children who hunger and are chilled by the wind Danny: All right Sherry that’ll do too – we only need you to voice 12 more characters Arin: Wha-*whining noises* Danny: Oh god. Hold on Arin: Don’t feel- Danny: ah Arin: Treasures there we go (Arin: I’ve equipped the treasure.) Danny: Excuse me I have a bit of a a bit of a runny nose and this game Danny: I think is making me sicker Arin: Okay, I can’t take the water from the Lake Arin: to give to the lady Arin: So it’s fine (Danny: Everything’s fine.) Oh- is that Pac-man over there? (*another voice*: head in my princess you look dry [wtf bruh]) Have a cup of endor cider on the house (Danny: You look dry?) calm the cells, but it will cost you 100 rupees. (Arin: I don’t have 100 rupees) Danny: You look like a dried-up hag *a female (?) voice* Sit a moment It is said those who go deep into the earth learn to overcome the sins of greed that may be true but I do know this a Candle and a silver key can bring you bliss. (Danny: Hey hey hey) Danny: It’s fat Albert! *voice* Times a wasting Arin: This is such a fucking like- like 80s cartoon cadence. (Danny: Yeah here we are, at this place!) (Danny: Gibbity-gabbity-goo!) *worn out voice* When you Spend you whole lifetime defeated like me. Get it over with, quit, go home, give up. Danny: Wow dude Voice in game: I Can see you’re not one to Surrender. All right take this dagger. (Danny: Oh, God that’s horrible) (Arin: What the-woah!) Danny: He gave you a fucking Sythe? (Arin: Sweet, I’m like Raphael) Awesome. (Danny: Yeah, just like that.) *worn voice again* I’m so exhausted from my travels, if only I had known to cross the chasm with the ladder It would have saved me months Danny: you know-you (Arin: Months? Really?) know I really- I think it’s the faces of these characters that really let me into their world and Danny: Help me connect with them emotionally. (Arin: I feel their plight. You know let’s just you just read the emotion-) oh my God. Danny: You know what fucking next time on Game Grumps alright, if we’re doing this then we really have to Danny: Really got to commit to it. (Arin: We’re doing it all the way dude.) We are not- (Arin: going all the way) I will not make it (Arin: Oh, yeah) Danny: But we could definitely do like seven episodes of this. (Arin: Okay) Danny: God help us. (Arin: Here we go) Bye~ Arin: Oh creature, magic creature *trails off* Danny: All you Zelda fans out there… loving this? (Arin: Oh yeah, they love it.)


Reader Comments

  1. Oh God! I know CD-i is bad but no one is lieing if they say this is worse than all the other CD-i games put together.

  2. Alright it's happening. I've tried to watch this soo many times. It's the one game that was bad enough I couldn't watch even with game grumps. One last try

  3. This game looks like a bad dream.

    Like you ate something moldy, and it's not sitting well. And now you're sick, dozing off, in a half… daze… in a heroic fantasy world that's half realistic.
    And for your brain it's all logical and it all makes sense… but something is wrong… and you can't exactly figure what…

  4. While it's mostly by accident, I think this game touches upon a very interesting sort of horror. The world feels very empty and surreal, and gives a sense of isolation. The strange dialogue of the NPCs, given the impression of deranged mumbling due to the horrible recording quality, all come off as genuinely mentally unwell.

    Imagine playing this game alone late at night, with only that hollow whooshing wind sound, the constant 'plink, plink' of your own footsteps, and the occasional confused, sedentary NPC. It evokes a sort of illness-aversion, where you don't want to talk with the NPCs for a subconscious fear of catching whatever disease they clearly have.

    Danny and Arin even mention at one point that the game is making them feel vaguely unwell. They may have been joking, but it definitely also gives me that slight fealing of uneasiness.

  5. This unironically makes the other CD-i games look good. They at least had music… They were bad, but they were charming. This is just bad.

  6. Guys I'm sorry. I love you but I'm sure I can get dumber in a less painful way. May God be with whoever manages to watch the whole series

  7. Honestly this game looks worse than Zelda Wand of Gamelan and Link The Faces of Evil

  8. idk why but every time i put on a sheet face mask i say to myself "i'll watch a game grumps episode, by the time it's over, i'll have to take it off" and every time i realize my mistake when i have to stop myself from laughing so the mask doesnt slide down my fucking face

  9. This could have easily have been fun if these guys understood that humorous commenting isn't about quantity.

  10. 13:12 “If you name yourseaf qoxonfase, you won’t able to get the sword it’s impossible.”

    This game has broken Arin and it’s just the first episode

  11. If you didn’t grow up in the 90s there is no way you can appreciate what video games were back then. At least there was no effing dlc bullshit. Any updates were free once internet became a thing

  12. At least we could appreciate faces of evil and wand of gamelon for how hilariously bad the cut scenes were. But this…this is just horrifying.

  13. Gooood the visuals remind me of the old mortal Kombat games. You know, the ones that had digitalized humans?

  14. Watching this for like the sixth time and the only real gripe I have with the series is that I can barely hear the game audio and I can't hear the music at All. Otherwise watching the Grump Boys suffer through this is pretty great

  15. Omg i absolutely love the comment section. Its almost as retarded as the game. One person mentions the game was acted by office staff and a trillion other comments pop up worded a little different. Its magical

  16. Its like the history of Zelda's dark past. That skeleton in the closet. Bad stain you can't wash off

  17. So let me get this straight. Of the 3 Zelda CDi games there's only one where you play as Link but that one doesn't even have the name Zelda in the title. What would of happened if they made a Metroid game? Would they of made you play as a Metroid? Why was this so hard to understand? Had they never played a Zelda game and just got a basic overview of the elements?

  18. Having watched this playthrough before, i wonder if that spell for sale in the bar that looked like a C would have saved much frustration later on?

  19. This is the dumbest game, if you can even call it that,
    that they have played. It's so cringy, i havent even watched it all the way through yet.

  20. How to play.
    Step one – take the game out of the cdi.
    Step two – smash it into a million pieces
    Step three – burry it deep below the earths crust.
    Step four – never speak of it again.

  21. You know I thought it was scientific impossible for the human eyes to get consent diarrhea…but after watching this I was proven wrong

  22. I’m not defending the other two CDI Zelda games but at least they kinda qualified as games. But this, this is in no way a game.

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